live on honey bee

I can't help but get so irritated and upset. My mind all day is run with reoccurring thoughts and memories. They won't stop and I absolutely hate it. It disgusts me, these memories and I wish I could just enjoy my day. It's a process that I seem to not be making much progress in.

Constantly I think I should be happy. Really fucking happy. But my soul, it's broken and all I can do is give it time to heal. Recovering from depression is like living a fractured life. Everything's here but nothing feels right. I have to remember time, that I must allow myself to feel but I cannot obsess and I cannot allow myself to overthink which I do so well.

My mind must be refreshed and I must live on, I will cry and I am not great right now but I will be. It takes time to be okay and it's okay that I'm not right now. I will be eventually, everything takes time, everything works out somehow.